I've had multiple occasions to share a particular parable over the past week with several colleagues who have been carrying some extra stuff around with them. So I thought I might share it here, too, in case it is more broadly useful. The story is not my own, belonging to a LONG tradition of Zen stories. This one is generally referred to as the story of the Two Monks & The Woman. Recognizing that there are as many variations of any of these tales as there are people to tell them, it goes something like this:

Two monks are walking back to the monastery when they chance upon an old woman who needs assistance crossing a river. After explaining her situation to the monks, one of the monks (typically the older one in the story), picks the woman up and carries her across the river.

As physically touching any women is a violation of the rules of the order that the monk's belong to, the other (younger) monk finds this violation to be intolerable, and he dutifully harangues his elder colleage for having the temerity to violate the rules and carry the woman across the river. This tongue-lashing continues all the way back to the monastery and for the duration of the day, and into the evening.

Finally, after being woken up from restful sleep by the younger monk and chastised for the umpteenth time that day, the older monk has finally had enough. "Yes" he says, "it is true that I did carry the woman across the river, in violation of the rules of our order. But you, brother, have been carrying her for the rest of the day."

We "carry a lot of old women" in the education space. A lot of that has to do with the work (which is complex and inevitably imperfect), and a lot of it has to do with ourselves as educators (many of whom want to do the absolutely correct move, every time). The end result is that we mess things up. Hopefully not a lot, and usually not in very significant ways, but making mistakes is an inevitability of the profession.

And when we make mistakes, we want to fix the things that we have messed up. Sometimes we can, but a lot of the time, we simply have to acknowledge that we violated the rules of our order, do the work we need to in order to try to avoid doing it again, and stop carrying the mistake beyond that point. Otherwise, we'll just keep haranguing ourselves, which doesn't do anybody any good.

It's an unprecedented situation on this planet right now. As educators, we are positioned quite close to the human side of the crisis. So we're going to make mistakes. I would hope that all of us can give ourselves and others the grace we need to be able to make those mistakes, learn from them, and then set them down to try again. I don't think dwelling on our mistakes with us does anyone any real good, any more than harping on the mistakes of others does. Now, more than ever, it is perfectly fine to put them down.

Do you have a thought, a parable of your own to share, or a desire to get in touch? Go for it here, or @DavidKnuffke. Comments are also always welcome